Okay…let’s just get right into this, shall we? The recent flux of live-action Disney remakes have been…hit or miss, to say the least. While I’ll maintain that the best I’ve seen is the 2016 Jungle Book remake, many of them have just kind of been okay. I’m talking about the ones like the 2017 Beauty and the Beast, or the 2015 Cinderella. These weren’t phenomenal, and they weren’t terrible. They were kind of just…there. They came and went, and while they were fun diversions, they don’t hold a candle to their original counterparts. However, I bring all of this up because my view towards these movies has started to become less and less favorable. Aladdin is the second of three live-action remakes coming out in 2019, and for all intents and purposes the movie just didn’t need to happen. I don’t really see any artistic reason to remake Aladdin, and so I really didn’t want this movie to happen. Things got even worse when trailers started coming out, and it didn’t take long for me to tell that I wasn’t going to like this movie very much. Still, I was hoping that at best it might be like some of the previous inoffensive diversions. What I got, though, is quite possibly the worst of the live-action remakes I’ve seen. This movie hurts to watch, and I recommend staying away from it.

I’m not going to even bother talking about the plot. This is a remake, and not much has changed here. If you aren’t familiar with the original Aladdin, please just go watch that. You’re going to have a much better time. If you’re familiar with it, though, this is the same story of a street rat that turns into a prince to impress the princess.

I’ll talk about the things I actually liked about this remake before getting into the negative stuff. For what it’s worth, the movie is competently made. I’m not going to be dramatic here and tell you that it’s one of the worst movies ever made, because it’s not. It’s shot well, the scenery looks pretty, and the costumes are gorgeous. Some of the worst movies I’ve seen aren’t even watchable, so Aladdin at least has that going for it.

Another compliment I’ll give is that I actually did like the portrayals of Aladdin and Jasmine. I thought both actors did a fine job portraying their characters, and so when the movie is focused on them, it’s not terrible. On that note, I think the best element of this remake is the romance between Aladdin and Jasmine. I found that these were easily the best scenes. There was one stretch of the movie where Aladdin is trying to impress Jasmine as a prince, including the rendition of “A Whole New World” (which is really the only musical number I liked here), that I found to be enjoyable. The rest is a different story.

Now, for the bad stuff. I think the easiest thing to complain about is going to be the two failures of portrayals that are here. While Aladdin and Jasmine may have worked here, Genie and Jafar are absolutely terrible. Jafar is the less offensive of the two, but it has to be said that the character just doesn’t come off as intimidating here. Part of the problem does lie in the fact that a pretty handsome actor was cast in the role, when part of the reason Jafar was so repulsive in the original is because he was so grotesque to look at. The acting doesn’t help, but I just didn’t like him as a villain here. Then, we have Will Smith as the Genie, which is probably one of the worst miscastings I’ve seen in recent memory. On paper, I understand how this may have seemed like a good choice, since Will Smith is a charismatic guy. However, his performance here is just embarrassing to watch. I actually would have been more okay about it if they had Will Smith just be himself here, but he’s trying to both be himself while also trying to play himself trying to play Robin Williams, and it just fails miserably. Not only does Will Smith do poorly, though, Genie also just looks TERRIBLE. This is one of the worst CGI jobs I’ve seen in a long time, and I’m surprised that it made the cut. Will Smith looks so bad as Genie, and so it’s no wonder why they made him not be blue for a lot of the movie. This was a truly embarrassing portrayal of Genie, and will probably be the most egregious sin of the movie for fans of the original.

Another big complaint I had was with the musical numbers. Again, I actually really did like “A Whole New World” here, but the rest of the songs were honestly trash. The worst ones were unsurprisingly the ones that Will Smith does, but none of them are great. Will Smith just doesn’t do well with this style of singing, and so it just comes off as awkward and cringey. Songs like “A Friend Like Me” are just embarrassing. Not only are they terrible to listen to, but the choreography and effects just suck. A lot of times it just looks like there’s a bunch of colors on screen, with no rhyme or reason.

I could probably forgive some of the missteps of the movie if it wasn’t such a bore. I didn’t have fun for 90% of the movie, and this is just unforgiveable to me. The movie just feels vapid, soulless, and thrown together without any real heart or passion behind it. It’s one of those movies that feels like it was just put out to make money, and that no real care was put into it. It feels corporately-made to the max, and it’s just abhorrent to me that the movie is so out of touch with what made the original great. The movie is so devoid of anything special or fun, and it makes the whole experience a chore to get through.

Maybe this one just wasn’t for me, since I have seen many people praise the movie. To me, this was just one of the finest examples of a movie that had no reason to be made, and was just put into theaters to sell tickets and cheaply cash in on nostalgia. While the movie may be watchable and has a few good elements going for it, most of it is just plain bad. The worst thing about the movie is by far Will Smith’s portrayal of Genie, but the whole thing just doesn’t work regardless. Like I said, you might feel differently about this movie, but I personally didn’t like it. I think this the worst Disney remake I’ve seen, and if this is a sign of things to come, then I want this trend to stop as soon as possible. I recommend staying away from this one, since it has nothing new to offer and instead just ruins everything that makes Aladdin enjoyable.

2/5